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Hope and Ashes

by Crayon Rubbings

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1.
Red-eyed poet You were made to die young Wild-haired monger You were made to die young The Midwest winter comes to kill Sunday dinner family will Lethal madness, sure success Midwest winter do your best Screaming wild man You were made to die young Soft-throat crooner You were made to die young The Midwest mothers package you Riddle your youth Extract you Wind fire tempest Wild tale spinner All life ends at a family dinner Loss of vigor Black lost orb One must fight or be absorbed Spark-eyed savior You were made to die young Oh, youthful rebel You were made to die young The Midwest father speaks still air Meet the family Be prepared Meet the aged ones Beat the score Be prepared to be absorbed Family kitchen, family room Family history, family tomb Family outing, family day Family squabble, family play Those who bend will meet the will Fire-tongued rat lives will be killed Red-eyed poet You were made to die young Wild haired monger You were made to die young The Midwest winter come to kill Sunday dinner Family will Lethal madness, sure success Midwest winter Do your best You were made to die young You were made To die young
2.
You’re no duke, a minister of fools With sealed lips who believe you And it’s no fluke that your motley touring troupe Excites and entertains you I know you’re not alone As much as should have known But oh how I have grown Trying to change you In your fair court where all issues are moot Who would dare defy you You hide the clues in your multi-colored moods And no earthly judge could try you So I will leave this court With an unspoken retort And I won’t waste one more word Trying to change you You waited a lifetime to change (Waited a lifetime to change) I waited a lifetime to change (To change) Was I ever right? Who was ever right? We were tied by binds We never wanted There were wars outside and there were wars inside And who knows how they started But who can hate, when even hate Can’t tell us why we parted So I will leave this fight Hoping I am right ‘Cause I won’t lose my life Trying to change you Trying to change Trying to change you
3.
Hunger hits the door and it Rattles the shack, it rattles the shack Think of your youth, yes and You want it back, you want it back It was so fab when you were With mom and dad, with mom and dad You want it good but you Can’t bring it back, can’t bring it back You cut my size you say I’ll fall off the track, I’ll come running back But I want my life good yes and I want it bad, I want it bad You’ll look a long way To find a woman who’ll take that You’ll look a lifetime For an idiot girl, for an idiot girl It’s so nice here with your Saturday games It’s so nice here with your suffering art You’ll get off that way in your good time It’s all that matters to you anyway It’s all that you want Bills hit the floor and they Rattle the shack, they rattle the shack You want a girl who will Sit in the back, who will live in the back But you’ll look a lifetime To find a woman who’ll take that And I’m not wrong to Want what I like, to like what I want To like what I, like what I, Like what I want, what I want Rattle the Shack Rattle the Shack
4.
Blank Pages 04:55
I picked it up when I got on board A thick blue book of staring faces Slow rolling down, a pale grey road A novel filled with blank pages Row after row they sit Love is frozen in their hearts Fixed eyes staring straight ahead They don’t know they’re moving Row after row they sit Monuments to nothing Fearing that their eyes might meet In this surreal story Can you feel love? Smile so they won’t see you Write to me of words you see Write and fill the pages I held it tight when I got on board And tore out a page and it fell free Tumbling back to where you sat The words appeared there suddenly Row after row they sit Love is frozen in their hearts Fixed eyes staring straight ahead They don’t know they’re moving Row after row they sit Monuments to nothing Fearing that their eyes might meet In this surreal story Can you feel love? Smile so they won’t see you Write to me of words you see Write and fill the pages
5.
Hey, the outside world is through a window Hey, the outside world is in a picture book I can stand here when you walk on by me On your way to the newest world, the next adventure No, you’re not an easy one to love May I have a place in your picture book? Will I know you for a moment, when you look right at me? May I hold you before you turn to go? Your text books would say, I’m in love with you Well right they are, I am in love with you Go far in this world and when you’re through Come back to this heart, this heart will be true I’ll be in love with you I’ll come out Hey, the outside world is through a doorway Hey, the outside world is in a story book I can stand here when you walk on by me on your way to the farthest world, the last adventure No, you’re not an easy one to love May I have a place in your story book? Will I know you for a moment, when you look right at me? May I hold you before you turn to go? Your pages would say, I’m in love with you Well right they are, I am in love with you Go far in this world and when you’re through Come back to this heart, this heart will be true I’ll be in love with you I’ll come out I’ll be in love with you I’ll come out
6.
Places 04:50
I like places where they don’t watch for stealing Safe in these places there is nothing to see When I am so tired, I wake in the dawn so tired The sounds of the bird’s songs tell me what’s real The sounds of the bird’s songs tell me what’s real I like places where strong words are silent For in these places hate can make no sound When I am so tired, I wake in the night so tired The sound of the trains wail tells me what’s real The sound of the trains wail tells me what’s real I will hear the rush in my ears And I will feel love come to comfort me And I will find peace in the quiet places I will find peace in your eyes I like places where your love can hold me When your love holds me, Lord, it feels so real When I am so tired, the worlds a cold room and I’m so tired The love when you hold me tells me what’s real The love when you hold me tells me what’s real
7.
Standing helpless in the tricks of time They hold me, their grasp grows tighter Youth has passed like a day at the fair Lights on the midway grow brighter Life dies a crib death in your parlor Slow down time, give life some room to grow You play our days like a game of numbers And fool us with talk of tomorrow Sitting calmly in the grace of life Time wills it, it knows its power We will believe in our foolish ways ‘Til time draws to close life’s hour Life dies a crib death in your parlor Slow down time, give life some room to grow You play our days like a game of numbers And fool us with talk of tomorrow Fool us with talk of tomorrow Standing helpless in the tricks of time They hold me, their grasp grows tighter Youth has passed like a day at the fair Lights on the midway grow brighter Life dies a crib death in your parlor Slow down time, give life some room to grow You play our days like a game of numbers And fool us with talk of tomorrow Fool us with talk of tomorrow
8.
Summer 04:26
Long summer, a hot dust summer Will it ever rain again? Riverbed's as dry as the moon Will it ever rain again? Clutching at her breaking heart She runs to the top of a hill A wild wind greets her, it plays in her hair And sends her a drop of rain Or is it a tear? Rain so cold It stings like fire sparks Rain so cold On her scorched brown skin When no one will tell her, the wind will tell her The wind will be her friend When an old farmhouse is an empty tomb The wind will be her friend And say “Don’t cry anymore” Cold sitter, he’s a cold sitter A great old clock ticks his hours away Lost again, he’s on the boat again An immigrant to a dying land And sound planner, he’s a sound planner His eyes tell her he’s got it all worked out “We will not last, but the land is forever" It’s started raining now Rain so cold It stings like fire sparks Rain so cold On her scorched brown skin When no one will tell her, the wind will tell her The wind will be her friend When all that’s left is blowing grass The wind will come again And say, "Watch it rain"

about

First full LP included 2 tracks from previous cassette release, down to 3 core members with guests.

credits

released December 15, 1988

Songs, keyboards and vocals: Laurel Garber
Guitar, keyboards, drum programming and bass: André Kuzniarek
Drums and percussion: Bill Webber
Additional guitar: Scott Peters
Saxaphone: Tim McNamara
Clarinet and drum programming: Wayne Sloan

Production and Engineering: André Kuzniarek
Album art and photography: André Kuzniarek

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Crayon Rubbings Champaign, Illinois

Crayon Rubbings formed in the early 80s, mixing influences across multiple genres, and featuring unapologetically demanding song forms, lyrics, and delivery from singer-songwriter Laurel Garber. While sometimes compared to Kate Bush at the time, Crayon Rubbings worked together as an ensemble, embracing an edgy live sound with collaborative studio experimentation. ... more

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